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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in ~ Kneel Before Zod!!! ~'s LiveJournal:

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Monday, November 10th, 2008
3:08 pm
[darksoul]
OMG!!! A BLACK LIBERAL IS GOING TO BE RUNNING OUR COUNTRY?!?!
As you have no doubt heard by now, somehow the people of The United States Of America managed to find themselves with a Democrat elected to the position of President. Even more astonishing, things have gotten so crappy in our country that people were able to overlook the fact that he was black when they were voting!

So how do people feel about this? I'll confess that I'm excited about the future. While I could go on at length about the various reasons for that feeling, I'd rather not taint discussion or give cause for people who might feel otherwise to refrain from sharing their opinions.
Wednesday, August 27th, 2008
9:52 pm
[darksoul]
THE RAPTURE IS UPON US!!!
BEHOLD LIBERUL HOMOSEXUACTIVIST AMERICA HATING FRENCHY TYPES!!! THE LORD IS SOON TO TAKE US HOME, FOR THE RAPTURE IS UPON US!!! HUMANITY HAS REACHED IT'S PINNACLE, TRUE ENLIGHTENMENT HAS BEEN BROUT TO US BY him!!! FEAST YOUR EYES UPON his FINAL GIFT TO HUMANITY BEFORE WRAPPING his ARMS AROUND EACH AND EVERY ONE OF his CHILDREN!!!

Additionally, in the 21st Century world that we live in, did I appropriately capitalize my references to the Christian leader? Is the rule that you have to capitalize every reference because He is considered His proper name or is it to indicate that he has a heightened level of importance? If the latter, does reversing whatever the common capitalization technique of the surrounding text have the same effect? Is this covered in the MLA handbook yet?
Monday, March 26th, 2007
1:10 pm
[evilgrins]
what's the cost of a few tears?
5:13 PM 3/24/07 · This has bugged me the longest time and each time I hear the reference I still don't get the significance. It may just be a little thing, it may be a big thing...but whatever kinda thing it is it's something that isn't quite registering on me.

"Jesus wept"

So?

The first time I heard this was watching the movie Hellraiser, a condemned soul says it just before being torn to shreds...held aloft by multiple chains in a vaguely crucificial position. Actually, one of my favorite films at the beginning of a great series...but that's not the point. I just heard it again as a half·assed way of saying grace before eating by Ice Cube in some movie, possibly one of the Barbershop films.

If I had to make a guess I'd assume it had something to do with Jesus while he was being executed, that the popular view might be that he didn't shed a tear despite the great pain he was no doubt going through. That's just a guess...

...though I grant it's a guess that's been bouncing around in my head the last couple decades.

I just never thought to ask before.

Well, here we are.

What does the reference "Jesus wept" refer to? If it is, in fact, when he was crucified then why wouldn't he cry? That kinda thing has got to hurt, not to mention that whole dying for all our sins part; I'd imagine that's not only symbolic but given his other impressive abilities it would likely be excessivly painful from an empathic point of view.

Jesus crying...what's the harm?

Current Mood: thirsty
Monday, March 12th, 2007
8:09 am
[evilgrins]
footsteps on the path
Whatever your spiritual/religious belief system is, when the time comes that you pass from this Existance and go into the Next, how do you think you'll feel when you discover whatever it is you think you know as the Truth turns out not to be?

Current Mood: awake
Tuesday, February 27th, 2007
8:10 am
[evilgrins]
this may get a tad ridiculous...
...it's my way. Just accept it.

7:15 PM 2/26/07 · If you caught my post from the other day, there's been a lot of recent buzz in the news regarding a documentary that will be on the Discovery channel this weekend about a tomb they believe to be that of Jesus of Nazareth. Shortly after I made this post someone said the existance of such a find refutes the ressurection.

That's just silly. I mean, okay, Jesus is executed and dies, gets buried, and then he wakes up and scares the crap out of some people as he makes his way...away. Now, unless he's still wandering around the planet somewhere it seems reasonable to assume that he eventually died again (hopefully of old age) and was buried.

The problem with this thought is that a lot of folks really stick to the whole bit of if it's not in the Bible it never happened. These are the types that believe the sacred tome word for word, which means the planet is much younger than it actually is, humans came into being more or less in the form we're in now, and evolution is a big no no. As you might take from the sarcastic tone I'm trying to get into the typing here, I don't buy that. There's a lot of things on the planet that is not mentioned in the Bible...

...like the platypus...

...does anyone really need better proof that God has a sense of humor?

Sticking wth Jesus, largely going from memory as I don't have a Bible handy, there's lots of little things the good book doesn't really say but you kinda assume he did. When the book was being put together they really seemed to be striving for making him seem as divine as possible, which I largely attribute to why so many people that take the book literally have such an issue with the possibility of his having children. I think a Jesus that is more human, amazing abilities notwithstanding, is easier to identify with and that's a good thing.

if you're a very stern or serious person, don't look in hereCollapse )

Current Mood: Boo!
Sunday, January 28th, 2007
1:36 pm
[evilgrins]
Ridiculous Religious Question of the Week
8:57 AM 1/28/07 · It kind of started with I am woman, hear me roar but I can never remember what the sound that came after that was. I mean, if it were I am man, hear me roar I'd expect it to be followed by a massive belch. From the 2nd Batman movie it was I am Catwoman, hear me roar and I'm pretty sure that was followed by a "Meow".

It's an empowerment thing.

Bet you're wondering what the Hell does this have to do with religion.

The way I see it Jesus was a pretty empowered guy: son of God, walked on water, raised the dead, great at party tricks; the guy had it going on. So naturally, goofy freak that I am, I had to ask myself...

...what would Jesus say in this kinda circumstance.

Sadly, I'm drawing a blank.

Fortunately I have all of you!

Please fill in the blank:

I am Jesus, hear me roar ________

How would Jesus roar?

Current Mood: silly
Sunday, January 21st, 2007
7:21 pm
[evilgrins]
Funny Ha Ha
I suspect there are a lot of them out there but I only know a couple. With all the humor that seems to surround Jesus, in the form of standup comedy and stuyff we pick up in school, you'd think there'd be a lot of them. Short of cracking open a joke book and going to the religious humor I can't name that many...

...but as I said, I know two.

Warning: contents may be sacriligiousCollapse )

Do you know any Jesus jokes?

Current Mood: giggly
Monday, January 8th, 2007
10:43 am
[evilgrins]
a couple other posts of mine inspired this one
9:48 PM 1/7/07 · I'm rather well known for a number of things. There's the fact I tend to ask direct and blatantly raw questions, oftimes none that anyone thought to put forth before. There's also the fact I'm something of a big goofball. Together they aren't a deadly combo but one should be wary nonetheless.

While I don't post every bizarre religious query to every single religious comm I'm a member of...I do post stuff across the board quite a bit. The responses I tend to view as holy wars...not just because I find the sudden outpouring of information to be happy inducing, evn the stuff I don't necessarily agree with, but because of the number of arguments/debates that erupt in the threads of each of these communities. Course, I get a number of people that end their comments with "I'll pray for you" which is nice and all but kinda gives the impression that because I came up with the initial post there's something worrisome or wrong with me.

Not so sure I'm thrilled about that but I'll take what support I can get.

A stretch back I put a list together of a bunch of random thoughts regarding Jesus, one of which was that I kinda hoped he at least knew the pleasure of a woman sometime before his crucifixtion. It was not intended to be sacriligious, nor as an insult to his image in any way...I just thought it would've been nice. It's kind of the beauty of random thoughts.

That whole random element thingamabob.

Last week I put up a post wondering what is it about a rabbi that they can have sex and marry but a priest cannot. The answers were very helpful in that but it brought up an interesting point which kinda reminded me on that little bit from my list. The defining point was that a priest and a rabbi aren't exactly the same thing...that a rabbi is more of a teacher than a religious officiary. Also that it is one of the guiding principles, from the Torah and by extension the Bible, that we should be fruitful and multiply. Hence...rabbis are bit with the multipliying.

You know, there could be a good pun in there for the similarity between rabbi and rabbit seeing as bunnies are all about multiplication.

Now while the people that followed the teachings of Jesus, a hundred or so years after his passing, are Christians he was not. Jesus was Jewish and a simple man...once you get passed that whole Son of God bit. I've never bought into the whole Lord & Savior bit because while I do accept the latter the former is quite askew to me. He wasn't a lord, the man never wanted special treatment and set it aside when it was offered. He was very charismatic and insightful and, above all else, a teacher.

Jewish...

Religious...

Teacher...

...I say Jesus was a rabbi.

Besides the teaching and other things that go with the title...there's that whole "fruitful & multiply" clause.

There's been a lotta debate since his time to now that Jesus might've had siblings, that Joseph & Mary had other children. Wouldn't it be even more interesting if Jesus himself had children. Be it with the ever controversial Mary Magdelyne or some other nice lady that made that special connection with the guy...I for one find the concept that Jesus may've had his own family and children to be a beautiful thing.

So, why is it that so many seem to find the concept of Jesus going to the happy place (having sex) being a bad thing/sacriligious/an affront to God? I mean he has a wife, they do the deed, there's children...

...what a concept to have the descendents of God wandering around the world to this day.

Current Mood: such a headache
Friday, December 22nd, 2006
11:15 am
[evilgrins]
Happy Holidays!
In my continued quest to come up with a question that no one can quote scripture at me for...

Let's say, hypothetically, God pops up in front of you and asks for a cookie. What kind would you get?

Obviously there's no wrong answer to this but feel free to explain your response.

Current Mood: silly
Thursday, November 16th, 2006
2:53 pm
[evilgrins]
I've had this thought before
What brought it up this time was a discussion with someone and he seemed kinda down on Jesus, saying that the man only preached himself and how he was the son of God and any number of other things that were all fairly self promoting. My take was that we only have the Bible's say on what Jesus did or did not say. The people that bound the Bible could've taken a little artistic license or just omitted whole bits of what the man actually said and what we've got are scattered bits out of context.

I mean really: there's not a body on this earth that can attest to having heard anything Jesus said firsthand.

This got me to thinking though. Jesus had a whole bunch of followers (disciples) and they all wrote down things that're in the Bible. Now given that Jesus was reading at an early age and reinterpreting scripture to boot...it stands to reason the guy could write.

Why is there no Book of Jesus? Everybody else has got a Book, segment in the Bible that a body can hardly ask a religious question without others quoting a passage to them from. Did Jesus write one and it got lost or did he simply not write anything at all?

Anybody know anything on this? Or have I just wandered a bit too far into my happy place?

Current Mood: weird
9:10 am
[evilgrins]
Why Jesus for God's sake?
12:05 PM 11/12/06 · It's so interesting how the littlest thing can cause conflict. Christianity is, more or less, Judaism with just the tiniest difference in opinion regarding who the Messiah is. I've even heard it said that there are those that think the fact that the heads of the Hebrew faith, back then...not now, were backing the Roman Empire in executing Jesus might also be a fair point of contention.

Let's ignore most of that for just a sec.

The Christians believe that Jesus is the Messiah, sometimes referred to as Jesus H. Christ even though I'm fairly certain that is not the family name that Mary & Joseph ever used, but his own people don't...

...or didn't...

...pick a tense.

So, what I'd like to know is what is it the Hebrew faith, and the Jewish people since it seems even the unfaithful were looking forward to the arrival, thought Jesus was lacking so as to not be the Messiah. Religions, regardless of what form they take, are really big with signs and omens and qualities. It seems likely that there were supposed to be a number of events, qualities in the person, sigils, and God knows what else so that when the Messiah popped up everybody would know.

Only everybody didn't know.

So, that brings us to some interesting questions:
  • Does anyone know how the Messiah was supposed to be known prior to Jesus popping up?

  • How long was Jesus alive before the Messiah tag was attached?

  • When Jesus was established as the Messiah what was it about him that made some of the faithful disbelieve this?

  • On the offchance they make another movie, and you know they will, who do you think should play Jesus?

Okay, maybe not so much that last one.

Not that I necessarily think Jesus was the Messiah...frankly I don't care one way or the other. He was a very great guy who had some very important things to say and that's good enough for me.

Current Mood: crazy
Monday, October 9th, 2006
10:59 am
[evilgrins]
God made me goofy
Do you suppose Jesus was a cat person or a dog person?

Why do you feel this way?

Current Mood: curious
Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
10:29 am
[evilgrins]
definitely an odd question
A friend had a survey/Q&A posted to their journal and it was filled with a host of weird question but it was the 1st one that really caught me eye:

1. You and Jesus go out to dinner. Who pays?

picking up the checkCollapse )

Current Mood: creative
Wednesday, September 6th, 2006
1:44 pm
[evilgrins]
Fear de evil dat is me!
Somewhere around the end of 2004 and the beginning of 2005 I put up a truly bizarre post. It was a continuation of an "Aliens vs Predator" thing I was doing...where I basically listed a whole bunch of random things for them to fight instead of each other. Like Godzilla, the Gummi Bears, NeoPets, Dragon Ball Z...

...which are about as unfair as you can get.

Somewhere in the initial writing of it I put up Jesus and then swiftly removed it. Not because I felt it violated any religious standard (basically a "no no") but because I felt that deserved a post all its own. It was a lot of fun to make and as I posted it widely the range of answers were very giggle worthy. Sure, some of it was preachy but overall it was a blast.

Think it's that time again.

On the offchance some of you are not familiar with the players here:

Predator: a hunting species with a brutal warriors code. While it is true they have strict rules against fighting the unarmed or those deemed not a threat I think that might be cast aside in order to make a trophy out of a guy that can walk on water, raise the dead, heal the sick with but a touch, and replicate food from next to nothing. Predators might not buy into the whole "Son of God" bit but that other stuff would make him all that more highly prized.

Aliens: a biomechanical hive type creature; (Acheronsis Linguefoda). The species lives on 3 fundamental drives; to kill, to breed, and to survive. Curious life cycle from egg to mobile embryo implanter (facehugger) to embryo to fully grown killing machine. They implant their embryos in living hosts which then explode out of that being's chest. Opinions vary but offspring sometimes take on attributes of that host. No specific intelligence but highly cunning and has molecular acid for blood.

While highly unlikely this one doesn't ring a bell...just in case:

Jesus of Nazareth: to those of the Christian faith this is the Messiah and Son of God. All around nice guy, very wise, likes helping people, a number of miraculous abilities, and he may even have been a carpenter in his own right.

So, the question I put to you is who do you think would win?

Alien vs Jesus: ???
Predator vs Jesus: ???

Depending on responses, I may put up another post in a month's time with the best answers.

Current Mood: silly
Thursday, August 31st, 2006
8:20 am
[evilgrins]
from whence did the name come?
7:48 PM 8/29/06 · One of the things I like about most of my religious posts, other than the truly wonky nature of the things I go on about, is the responses. They range from the people that want to discuss whatever it is I put forth, those that outright condemn me for it, a few that pray that I will one day be shown the way from on High, and the seemingly holy war that erupts among the commenters when they discover they don't quite see things eye to eye. More than that, as I learned via my previous main account, even though the initial outpouring of comments may go on from days to weeks...sometimes I will be pleasntly surprised by someone who decides to get their 2¢ in as far as a year after the fact.

By the by, to those that hope God will show me the way someday...did you ever stop to consider maybe that already happened? Not saying it did, suspect I'd know it less than anybody else, but it is an interesting thought.

Moving right along...

...preamble seems to be the genetic curse of my family line.

I seem to go on about Jesus quite a bit which mainly stems from the fact I find him to be an endlessly interesting guy. Moreso the fact that nobody seems to get his name right, I only actually use Jesus because otherwise no one would know who I was talking about. From numerous posts and discussions, like I went on about in that first paragraph, the consensus opinion from those as or more learned than I is that his name was Yeshua. The last major Jesus posting I did I actually learned the reason why most folks refer to him by the "J" name...

...in the King James Bible, named for a certain King James who started this particular mess, he decided that Jesus was to be called that so as his name wouldn't be confused with another man in there that is currently listed by the name they both shared.

I've often felt the fact that no one in the Bible has a last name was a miraculously ongoing typo.

Wow.

Kinda scary.

Went through all of that just to lead up to one question.

Preamble...it's a curse on us all.

Traditionally children are named by their parents and I'm sure there was no exception when little Jesus came kicking and screaming into the world. Only problem is that he had 3 parents: Mary (Mom) & Jospeph (Stepdad) & the Big Guy (Dad)...

...do not covet thy neighbor's wife my ass! I suspect this was where the phrase do as I say and not as I do was invented...

...but I digress.

Whatever that original name might've been...who do you suppose it was that named him?

Current Mood: relaxed
Friday, July 28th, 2006
8:24 am
[evilgrins]
Thoughts on Jesus
  • I don't see Jesus as my lord and savior. That last bit maybe but definitely not the first. This was a guy that balked at any special treatment that people tried to show him. He was a teacher...not royalty.

  • When Jesus walked on the water, do you suppose his feet got wet? Were there ripples caused by each step?

  • Jesus lived a fair stretch of time and was executed. Then he rose from the dead, spooked a few people, and disappeared. What exactly happened to him after that? Did he go onto Heaven or is he wandering the world to this day as a well preserved zombie?

  • Why did they translate his name? Jesus isn't very Aramaic, the language spoken in his region & time. Scholars, I've checked, say his name was actually Yeshua. So, why is it everyone calls him other than his given name?

  • It'd be a shame if he died a virgin. I mean, with all the guy had to put up with in life it'd've been nice to know he got a little on the side.

  • Jesus was of the Hebrew faith and born Jewish. I've never quite gotten why those that follow his teachings aren't still Jewish...or at the very least Hebrew.

  • I can picture Jesus in torn jeans, blue baseball cap worn backwards, standard shirt with the sleeves rolled up, seated on the front steps of some major library, totally engrossed in a book on Eastern philosophies with no difficutly whatsoever.

  • Don't actually know if Jesus had any brothers or sisters. Don't know if he might not've had kids of his own. Don't even know if he has surviving blood relations to this day. However, wouldn't it be really cool if he did?

  • I don't buy into the whole Jesus being God thing because not only would that mean he got his own mother pregnant with himself but it would kind of lend itself to God suffering from multiple personality disorder.

  • Even though I put no stock in it, can't help but laugh at a notion from Red Dwarf: belive it was Rimmer who didn't believe in the reality of Jesus because any child who developed magical powers and not tried to join the circus was a ludicrous concept.

  • There's been a lot of controversy, in relatively recent decades, about the ethnicity of Jesus given the region of the world he lived in and how he is most often perceived to appear. While I think the message is more important than the man....I highly doubt he was caucasian.

  • I remember this little bit, I saw in a movie, how Jesus first came as a lamb but he shall return as a lion. This tends to give me a hybridized mental vision of him and Rambo.

  • As messed up as the world is today, if Jesus actually did come back it wouldn't be long before he was put away into some federal lockup.

  • I'd like to think he'd be just as disgusted with the production of "Jesus Christ Superstar" as I was.

  • I hate the crucification....and I don't mean the event itself. Going into a church and seeing a representation of him hanging there bloodied and broken, in obvious agony; its barbaric! I get the whole died for our sins bit but that doesn't mean we should have to see it anytime we goto worship. I'd much rather see him represented doing what he did in life rather than the slow and painful way he was brought down.

  • Given the types of folks Jesus hung out with before it occurs to me that the faithful might be in for a rude awakening. A guy that didn't choose to live in the lap of luxury before is unlikely to start now.

  • Similar to the last one, Jesus came up in the Hebrew faith but was largely rejected by its religious leaders. I'd be very much surprised if the same thing didn't happen again should he return and interact with the leaders of the Christian faith.

  • There are many who believe Jesus will return someday but how is he supposed to be recognized? It's not like there's a wholly accurate description of the guy or listing of identifying marks; can't exactly check his dental records. For all anyone knows he may've already come and gone.

  • Reincarnation not being an exact science, wouldn't it be interesting if Jesus returned as a woman?


Current Mood: awake
Sunday, February 5th, 2006
11:11 am
[mojo_iv]
lapd
You worked for the 1991 Los Angeles Police

Department. When not engaged in illicit

criminal activities and marijuana

interdiction, you occasionally find the time

to beat ethnic motorists.


Which Law Enforcement Agency from History are you?
brought to you by Quizilla


--m4
Friday, January 20th, 2006
8:49 pm
[mojo_iv]
"If you were Steve Tyler, and you could sleep with any woman you wanted to, who would it be?"

"Uhhhhh... Liv Tyler?"

--m4
Friday, December 31st, 2004
10:45 am
[dinglehopper]
how tollerant and caring...
teh following post from mountain_hiker really did not sit well in my mind, and i'd like everyone to take a sneak peak at this...

btw - mountain_hiker tend to have a lot of really good posts on this sort of thing, as well as politically oriented material as well.

----

Aaaaaand from our lovely friends at Westboro Baptist Church:






Doing their best to take the "human" out of "humanitarian".

----

my comment to people that believe that the tsunami that hit Sri Lanka, India, Indonesia and the rest of the area...

"you should have been the victims of that tsunami."

i might also point out that the bible says to treat your enemy as your brother, to show compassion, and to love one another. this clearly goes against those ideals set forth in the bible.

fucking hypocrites.
Thursday, December 23rd, 2004
8:22 pm
[srm_is_a_gimp]
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