Seriously though

OMG!!! A BLACK LIBERAL IS GOING TO BE RUNNING OUR COUNTRY?!?!

As you have no doubt heard by now, somehow the people of The United States Of America managed to find themselves with a Democrat elected to the position of President. Even more astonishing, things have gotten so crappy in our country that people were able to overlook the fact that he was black when they were voting!

So how do people feel about this? I'll confess that I'm excited about the future. While I could go on at length about the various reasons for that feeling, I'd rather not taint discussion or give cause for people who might feel otherwise to refrain from sharing their opinions.
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Seriously though

THE RAPTURE IS UPON US!!!

BEHOLD LIBERUL HOMOSEXUACTIVIST AMERICA HATING FRENCHY TYPES!!! THE LORD IS SOON TO TAKE US HOME, FOR THE RAPTURE IS UPON US!!! HUMANITY HAS REACHED IT'S PINNACLE, TRUE ENLIGHTENMENT HAS BEEN BROUT TO US BY him!!! FEAST YOUR EYES UPON his FINAL GIFT TO HUMANITY BEFORE WRAPPING his ARMS AROUND EACH AND EVERY ONE OF his CHILDREN!!!

Additionally, in the 21st Century world that we live in, did I appropriately capitalize my references to the Christian leader? Is the rule that you have to capitalize every reference because He is considered His proper name or is it to indicate that he has a heightened level of importance? If the latter, does reversing whatever the common capitalization technique of the surrounding text have the same effect? Is this covered in the MLA handbook yet?
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    Grandaddy - Laughing Stock
gotta problem bub?

what's the cost of a few tears?

5:13 PM 3/24/07 · This has bugged me the longest time and each time I hear the reference I still don't get the significance. It may just be a little thing, it may be a big thing...but whatever kinda thing it is it's something that isn't quite registering on me.

"Jesus wept"

So?

The first time I heard this was watching the movie Hellraiser, a condemned soul says it just before being torn to shreds...held aloft by multiple chains in a vaguely crucificial position. Actually, one of my favorite films at the beginning of a great series...but that's not the point. I just heard it again as a half·assed way of saying grace before eating by Ice Cube in some movie, possibly one of the Barbershop films.

If I had to make a guess I'd assume it had something to do with Jesus while he was being executed, that the popular view might be that he didn't shed a tear despite the great pain he was no doubt going through. That's just a guess...

...though I grant it's a guess that's been bouncing around in my head the last couple decades.

I just never thought to ask before.

Well, here we are.

What does the reference "Jesus wept" refer to? If it is, in fact, when he was crucified then why wouldn't he cry? That kinda thing has got to hurt, not to mention that whole dying for all our sins part; I'd imagine that's not only symbolic but given his other impressive abilities it would likely be excessivly painful from an empathic point of view.

Jesus crying...what's the harm?
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    Angel the series
my nature - good to be wolf

footsteps on the path

Whatever your spiritual/religious belief system is, when the time comes that you pass from this Existance and go into the Next, how do you think you'll feel when you discover whatever it is you think you know as the Truth turns out not to be?
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    Bulletproof Monk
for all you drama queens

this may get a tad ridiculous...

...it's my way. Just accept it.

7:15 PM 2/26/07 · If you caught my post from the other day, there's been a lot of recent buzz in the news regarding a documentary that will be on the Discovery channel this weekend about a tomb they believe to be that of Jesus of Nazareth. Shortly after I made this post someone said the existance of such a find refutes the ressurection.

That's just silly. I mean, okay, Jesus is executed and dies, gets buried, and then he wakes up and scares the crap out of some people as he makes his way...away. Now, unless he's still wandering around the planet somewhere it seems reasonable to assume that he eventually died again (hopefully of old age) and was buried.

The problem with this thought is that a lot of folks really stick to the whole bit of if it's not in the Bible it never happened. These are the types that believe the sacred tome word for word, which means the planet is much younger than it actually is, humans came into being more or less in the form we're in now, and evolution is a big no no. As you might take from the sarcastic tone I'm trying to get into the typing here, I don't buy that. There's a lot of things on the planet that is not mentioned in the Bible...

...like the platypus...

...does anyone really need better proof that God has a sense of humor?

Sticking wth Jesus, largely going from memory as I don't have a Bible handy, there's lots of little things the good book doesn't really say but you kinda assume he did. When the book was being put together they really seemed to be striving for making him seem as divine as possible, which I largely attribute to why so many people that take the book literally have such an issue with the possibility of his having children. I think a Jesus that is more human, amazing abilities notwithstanding, is easier to identify with and that's a good thing.

if you're a very stern or serious person, don't look in hereCollapse )
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red face

Ridiculous Religious Question of the Week

8:57 AM 1/28/07 · It kind of started with I am woman, hear me roar but I can never remember what the sound that came after that was. I mean, if it were I am man, hear me roar I'd expect it to be followed by a massive belch. From the 2nd Batman movie it was I am Catwoman, hear me roar and I'm pretty sure that was followed by a "Meow".

It's an empowerment thing.

Bet you're wondering what the Hell does this have to do with religion.

The way I see it Jesus was a pretty empowered guy: son of God, walked on water, raised the dead, great at party tricks; the guy had it going on. So naturally, goofy freak that I am, I had to ask myself...

...what would Jesus say in this kinda circumstance.

Sadly, I'm drawing a blank.

Fortunately I have all of you!

Please fill in the blank:

I am Jesus, hear me roar ________

How would Jesus roar?
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    Psych
unnecessary cuteness

Funny Ha Ha

I suspect there are a lot of them out there but I only know a couple. With all the humor that seems to surround Jesus, in the form of standup comedy and stuyff we pick up in school, you'd think there'd be a lot of them. Short of cracking open a joke book and going to the religious humor I can't name that many...

...but as I said, I know two.

Warning: contents may be sacriligiousCollapse )

Do you know any Jesus jokes?
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    giggly giggly
everybody needs coffee

a couple other posts of mine inspired this one

9:48 PM 1/7/07 · I'm rather well known for a number of things. There's the fact I tend to ask direct and blatantly raw questions, oftimes none that anyone thought to put forth before. There's also the fact I'm something of a big goofball. Together they aren't a deadly combo but one should be wary nonetheless.

While I don't post every bizarre religious query to every single religious comm I'm a member of...I do post stuff across the board quite a bit. The responses I tend to view as holy wars...not just because I find the sudden outpouring of information to be happy inducing, evn the stuff I don't necessarily agree with, but because of the number of arguments/debates that erupt in the threads of each of these communities. Course, I get a number of people that end their comments with "I'll pray for you" which is nice and all but kinda gives the impression that because I came up with the initial post there's something worrisome or wrong with me.

Not so sure I'm thrilled about that but I'll take what support I can get.

A stretch back I put a list together of a bunch of random thoughts regarding Jesus, one of which was that I kinda hoped he at least knew the pleasure of a woman sometime before his crucifixtion. It was not intended to be sacriligious, nor as an insult to his image in any way...I just thought it would've been nice. It's kind of the beauty of random thoughts.

That whole random element thingamabob.

Last week I put up a post wondering what is it about a rabbi that they can have sex and marry but a priest cannot. The answers were very helpful in that but it brought up an interesting point which kinda reminded me on that little bit from my list. The defining point was that a priest and a rabbi aren't exactly the same thing...that a rabbi is more of a teacher than a religious officiary. Also that it is one of the guiding principles, from the Torah and by extension the Bible, that we should be fruitful and multiply. Hence...rabbis are bit with the multipliying.

You know, there could be a good pun in there for the similarity between rabbi and rabbit seeing as bunnies are all about multiplication.

Now while the people that followed the teachings of Jesus, a hundred or so years after his passing, are Christians he was not. Jesus was Jewish and a simple man...once you get passed that whole Son of God bit. I've never bought into the whole Lord & Savior bit because while I do accept the latter the former is quite askew to me. He wasn't a lord, the man never wanted special treatment and set it aside when it was offered. He was very charismatic and insightful and, above all else, a teacher.

Jewish...

Religious...

Teacher...

...I say Jesus was a rabbi.

Besides the teaching and other things that go with the title...there's that whole "fruitful & multiply" clause.

There's been a lotta debate since his time to now that Jesus might've had siblings, that Joseph & Mary had other children. Wouldn't it be even more interesting if Jesus himself had children. Be it with the ever controversial Mary Magdelyne or some other nice lady that made that special connection with the guy...I for one find the concept that Jesus may've had his own family and children to be a beautiful thing.

So, why is it that so many seem to find the concept of Jesus going to the happy place (having sex) being a bad thing/sacriligious/an affront to God? I mean he has a wife, they do the deed, there's children...

...what a concept to have the descendents of God wandering around the world to this day.
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    The Stand
just what do I have to eat?

Happy Holidays!

In my continued quest to come up with a question that no one can quote scripture at me for...

Let's say, hypothetically, God pops up in front of you and asks for a cookie. What kind would you get?

Obviously there's no wrong answer to this but feel free to explain your response.
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2 - I didn't quite get hear that

I've had this thought before

What brought it up this time was a discussion with someone and he seemed kinda down on Jesus, saying that the man only preached himself and how he was the son of God and any number of other things that were all fairly self promoting. My take was that we only have the Bible's say on what Jesus did or did not say. The people that bound the Bible could've taken a little artistic license or just omitted whole bits of what the man actually said and what we've got are scattered bits out of context.

I mean really: there's not a body on this earth that can attest to having heard anything Jesus said firsthand.

This got me to thinking though. Jesus had a whole bunch of followers (disciples) and they all wrote down things that're in the Bible. Now given that Jesus was reading at an early age and reinterpreting scripture to boot...it stands to reason the guy could write.

Why is there no Book of Jesus? Everybody else has got a Book, segment in the Bible that a body can hardly ask a religious question without others quoting a passage to them from. Did Jesus write one and it got lost or did he simply not write anything at all?

Anybody know anything on this? Or have I just wandered a bit too far into my happy place?
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    weird weird